Funny Cuz It's True


I wanna buy this for someone haha


I would be really good at this. …


God Keeper!

You fart ONCE and a guy never lets you live it down.


It horrified me @Starling, i can still hear it echo.

And And do you remember the cat running outa the room…

Good times eh


The shirt is cute too.


Dirty lies!


Wait…what…You busted ass in front of Keeper???:astonished:

WTF is wrong with you?..Get control of your asshole, bitch…Jesus H. Christ!

Where the fuck did you grow up…a logging camp?


ONCE! I coughed and one tiny little fluff slipped out and my headphones are so good he heard it.

That’s the best I can come up with while laughing so hard! :laughing:


I know right.
We were yapping on Skype and all the sudden the thunder roared , dust came down from the ceiling fan and the cat almost lost his fur he got outa there so fast.
And you know polite me, I said Ohhh must be a storm.
But!!! Her child came in and says… MOMMMM omg the smell what is that.
It was a shit show for sure…
I don’t fart shame her though.


I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me…

Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.


My parents were standing in line at the theater to see the hot new movie in town, and ahead of them in line was this Mutt and Jeff couple, petite attractive wife and her slovenly overweight hubby who was busy stuffing his face with popcorn and stuff, he let’s loose with a very rousing emssion of gases and immediately tells his wife in his stage voice, “Oh don’t worry honey, all these people will just think it was me” My dad would spontaneously crack up over that one for years after.


Something like that happened to my Dad when he was in college at OU. He would sit behind this VERY pretty coed, and one time she cut bait very loudly and then turned around and glowered at him. He said he turned red and tried to sink into his chair.



Well, we all know that you are a gentleman.

BUT be careful…don’t go too easy on her. Otherwise the next time you talk, she might be in the bathroom shitting with door open.


That would crazy…


Husband: “I tell dad jokes now. I’m steppin’ up my gaaaaaame!”




A card a friends grand daughter made for him…


Breaking up is hard to do.


Food for Thought: Almost every hand you’ve ever shaken has had a dick in it.