Funny Cuz It's True


I searched for “sexy pumpkin” and this was the first result:



My best part is the pumpkin root on his dick rofl


I’d call that “goodbye kitty” toilet paper.


At least it wasn’t “stuck up kitty” toilet paper.

Then it would have been “zeek plunger kitty”…


Zeek plungers the kitty all the time :smile:

(Had to be said.)


If youi’re famous they have to let you.


I’m famous in Canada!

Or at least that’s what I told a guy while doing a limo tour of Vegas haha


(context: game of thrones death scene)


(hovertext: “I started off with countless problems. But now I know, thanks to COUNT(), that I have “#REF! ERROR: Circular dependency detected” problems.”




My daughter, who was holding a banana, just said this:

“One of these days I’m going to bring a banana to a school dance and only dance with that banana.”

I’m starting to think public school was a bad idea.


Yeah, you’d think she would know about cucumbers by now.




Oh God! I didn’t even think about that!!!



Well, her genetics is packed with DNA from people that desecrated McDonald’s FFS.


True. I’m in trouble.


Well, you don’t know yet. Too soon to tell. I was just pulling your leg.


No…she’s in trouble…



Yeah, I know! Just wanted her to breathe easy for a minute.